I guess I'm to live to be 76 yrs old and die of cancer. At least thats what this online test says
Death Test
Saturday, August 27, 2005
Sunday, August 21, 2005
Sex, Drugs and No Rock and Roll ...
The thing I hate the most about my med cocktail is the effect on the sexual part of my being. I believe it is the Risperdal that is the main culprit.
My mind is willing, but with the mutted BIG "O" it almost makes it a waste of time for me. But just being together with my wife is what counts I guess. I dont worry about the diminished "O" that much because the making love part is better than the actual act itself. The drugs dont effect the sensitivity of touch, smell or the emotion of two people sharing a private moment together behind closed doors.
We've discusses taking a drug holiday before to see what happens. I have no problem doing this myself but my wife needs her drug regiment with her schizophrenia. I'm afraid for her to go off her meds at all due the her recent hospitalization. So we won't go down that road.
So I guess in order to function properly in life we must have to sacrifice other things in our life. I just wish it wasn't sexual pleasure ! But we know that at this point its a problem that we dont need to get too upset about...
My mind is willing, but with the mutted BIG "O" it almost makes it a waste of time for me. But just being together with my wife is what counts I guess. I dont worry about the diminished "O" that much because the making love part is better than the actual act itself. The drugs dont effect the sensitivity of touch, smell or the emotion of two people sharing a private moment together behind closed doors.
We've discusses taking a drug holiday before to see what happens. I have no problem doing this myself but my wife needs her drug regiment with her schizophrenia. I'm afraid for her to go off her meds at all due the her recent hospitalization. So we won't go down that road.
So I guess in order to function properly in life we must have to sacrifice other things in our life. I just wish it wasn't sexual pleasure ! But we know that at this point its a problem that we dont need to get too upset about...
Tuesday, August 09, 2005
Feeling so good that....
I've reached a point now in my treatment that I'm sure everyone in my situation has experienced... Do I really need to be on these drugs ?
I feel so good right now I am questioning the need to be on any drugs at all. Maybe I'm not even Bipolar. Maybe I was just going through a rough time in my life.
But in reality, I know it's the drugs that have gotten me to this point of feeling this good. I've done enough research to know that I would reach this point in my life. I also know it would be pure foolishness to stop my drug regiment.
It's funny that I've reached this point. I don't think there is an article about Bipolar on the internet that I haven't read. I believe I've read 25-50 blogs about Bipolar illness. All of them lead to the same conclusion... Meds do work, and don't stop taking them just because you feel good. I don't want to go back into a mania where I don't sleep or feel bad so I'll guess I'll do the smart thing and keeping swallowing all the pills...
I feel so good right now I am questioning the need to be on any drugs at all. Maybe I'm not even Bipolar. Maybe I was just going through a rough time in my life.
But in reality, I know it's the drugs that have gotten me to this point of feeling this good. I've done enough research to know that I would reach this point in my life. I also know it would be pure foolishness to stop my drug regiment.
It's funny that I've reached this point. I don't think there is an article about Bipolar on the internet that I haven't read. I believe I've read 25-50 blogs about Bipolar illness. All of them lead to the same conclusion... Meds do work, and don't stop taking them just because you feel good. I don't want to go back into a mania where I don't sleep or feel bad so I'll guess I'll do the smart thing and keeping swallowing all the pills...
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